Dear Kitoto,
I am a 40 and married for 15 years, but I am sad and frustrated. I got married to a businessman who had another family and many other children born out of wedlock. I am a civil servant.
Immediately after we got married, he left all the responsibilities to me. He brought all his illegitimate children to my house, which was very burdensome. Whenever I complained, he would beat me up.
His first wife would travel and leave her children with me. I did everything for the children, including visiting them in school. This became too much and I developed ulcers. Every time I asked him for money he would remind me that I also earned a salary.
He is so adulterous. He sleeps around with different women. This has affected his business and he is now jobless.
I became so stressed at some stage that I suffered depression and a mild stroke. My doctor advised me to take a transfer and leave him. I did so, but he followed me to my new station. He started chasing after every woman he could sight and was once beaten up in town for pursuing somebody’s wife.
He has refused to look for a job. He is comfortable staying at home and bringing women to my bed when I am at work. When I ask him to go out and look for employment, he says I am being unfair to him, and that he is looking for a place to go to. My worry is that he does not want to assist me to look after the children, and he expects me to take care of him without complaint.
To make myself a little happy, I started seeing another man. He is caring and loving to me.
My husband really mistreated me when he had money. Now he wants to force me to stay with him and take care of him. Right now, my children are at home because of lack of school fees, which he expects me to raise. What do I do? Please help me before I do something crazy.
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